Neptune's Young and Restless
by Serena Thorn
Summary: It's Veronica's turn to pick what she and Lamb are watching for the night. She chooses a soap opera. And not just any soap...


Title: Neptune's Young and Restless  
>Summary: It's Veronica's turn to pick what she and Lamb are watching for the night. She chooses a soap opera. And not just any soap...<br>Rating: PG-13  
>Spoilers: None for VM and up to mid-August '09 of Y&amp;R<br>Word Count: 1000  
>Disclaimer: Veronica Mars is not owned by me, but by Rob Thomas. I'm simply borrowing these characters for non-profit entertainment.<br>A/N: Post-AU-S3. Pure crack fic. Two Michael Muhney characters for the price of one. It had to be done.

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><p>"Aren't soap operas softcore porn for housewives? You're not a housewife. Why can't we just watch the real deal?" Lamb asked her as he brought over the popcorn bowl.<p>

"Because I'm not nearly as interested in lesbians as you are," Veronica replied without missing a beat.

"You know you're missing out. Besides restless you may be but you're not as young as you once were."

"You're older than I am. Now, quiet, it's starting."

"This is gonna be one of those things were you have to tell me who's who and what's going on the whole time, isn't it? Remind me to take the TiVo back."

"Okay, Lamb, take the TiVo back and miss all of your soccer, football, baseball and basketball games," she grinned.

He glared. She would go there. "Alright, who's this one and why am I supposed to care about him?"

Veronica spent the next two scenes explaining Jack Abbott and Victor Newman and their long standing feud to her 'Young and the Restless'-oblivious husband.

"Uh huh. _Now_ I see the real reason you're watching this. I still say my porn's better," he commented at the sight of the towel-clad actor on the screen.

"Oh, hush. You'll have yourself a blonde sighting soon enough, Adam's girlfriend just happens to be one. And she's an ADA."

"His girlfriend's an ADA and he's wearing an ankle monitor?" Lamb was quickly realizing how this was a soap opera and not reality. Of course he couldn't quite understand Veronica's recent love of the show.

"Oh yeah, I'm not entirely sure what all he did to earn it though, he was a different person then, I wasn't paying much attention through the whole forging of the diary thing or Adam apparently setting Victor up for murder or when Adam got jumped in prison. He really only got interesting in the last few weeks between rendering himself nearly completely blind after trying to trick people into thinking he's actually blind so he wouldn't be found out as the one who's gaslighting Ashley just to punish his father for the hell he feels he's put him through. It's all about payback for him and well, he's not exactly above doing absolutely anything to get what he wants."

"Should I be worried that you just said all of that without taking a breath?"

"No," she lied. She liked the show, what of it? And this 'NuAdam' really wasn't so bad to look at. Come to think of it, he looked a little familiar. She guessed that was part of the appeal.

"Wait a minute! We see more of him then her? That's it, no more of this for you. I don't like what it's filling your head with," Lamb went on when the show came back from break and the ADA girlfriend was fully clothed while Adam was still lacking a shirt.

"Hey!" Veronica all but squeaked when he grabbed the remote.

"Ow!" he cried when she dug her nails and bony little fingers into his thigh.

"It's my night to choose the viewing. I chose this. Deal with it."

"I just don't get it, if he's blind -"

"Not completely, not yet at least."

"This is painful," Lamb groaned a half an hour later when he watched Adam slip his ankle monitor off.

"Oh. Yeah. He does that. It's funny though, the last actor they had in this role was actually a bigger guy than this one so it makes sense that he'd be able to take the monitor off."

"Veronica, I'm still a sheriff. This isn't something I need to see."

"Oh please we haven't even gotten to Adam's aiding and abetting of the woman who shot his father's nemesis twenty years ago."

It was official. He was being tortured and he had no idea why. In recent memory he hadn't left the seat up, hadn't fought with or humiliated Keith, hadn't arrested Veronica or any of her friends and yet here he sat on the sofa he'd paid for with his supposedly loving wife, watching what he was beginning to realize were selected scenes of a soap opera. And funnily enough all of these selected scenes had the smug as hell, half-blind, ankle monitor-wearing Adam in them. Lamb might have been a little jealous or concerned if he hadn't noticed the slight resemblance between himself and the guy on the screen.

"He's blackmailing a doctor? Does this guy ever -"

"Dr. Taylor, yeah I have no idea when he met him or how he found out about Dr. Taylor's interest in his students."

"Well you might if you watched more than just certain scenes that all seem to have the same guy in them," he shot back.

She glared. "You've seen Jack and Victor and Mary Jane."

"All in this Adam guy's scenes. I think you have a problem."

"So, wait... You expect me to watch scenes that Adam's not in? Yeah. Does not compute."

That time he laughed. He had to. This was too unreal. He was watching a soap opera on his night off and Veronica was so enthralled by the actor on the screen that she probably wouldn't even notice if he left the room.

"So when do we get to the girl on girl lily pond fight?"

"Wrong soap."

"Figures," he sighed.

A few hours later however, Lamb found himself rethinking some of his earlier complaints when he saw an all familiar look in Veronica's eyes when she watched him come out of the bathroom after his shower. Something told him he was either about to reap some benefits of Veronica watching her soap or be rewarded himself for having sat through what she had deemed the highlights of that past week's episodes.

Maybe it was the fact Lamb wasn't wearing anything but the towel around his waist, but Veronica once again started wondering if there wasn't a reason she was really beginning to like that new Adam.

There was just something so familiar about him.

The End


End file.
